Now don't think I am going to get depressing or negative on this topic, its not the case. I want to highlight, however, the truth about happiness in the many forms in which we feel it and what we can do to obtain a constant happiness and contentment with our lives.
The majority of us are happy in one situation alone: When we get what we want. What that thing is that we want is quite diverse though, and highly individual. A child may want a spotted pony, a boy may want a mega toy truck, a girl may want a pretty doll, a teen may want a girlfriend, a student may want perfect test results, a woman may want silky hair, and a man may want a raise. The selfless of us may want no material thing for themselves, but rather to provide others with their needs and thus obtaining indirect material gratification through being the provider. Regardless of what we want, when that want is met it also never fails to fade as our source of happiness.
Why? Because as human beings our desires are constant and increasing. In our ancestors' ancient world, needs were focused on things that we take for granted today, such as the availability of water and food, shelter from the weather, and finding a mate that is capable of producing progeny. Their needs were met, on occasion, and thus they felt happiness until the food ran out or until that progeny overruns the clan and ousts the boss (his father)... In modern days our needs have largely progressed past focus on basic needs and grown into a desire to surpass each other in extravagance obtained via financial excess (on appearance basis at least). We no longer need anything as the government (usually) takes care of the basics, if we cannot provide it for ourselves, leaving us with the pleasant task of setting extraordinary goals that we have deemed as necessary to achieve in order to obtain happiness.
But what if (heaven forbid) we aren't able to accomplish our goals that we were aiming for? Should we all go find the highest bridge and conveniently forget our bungee gear? Absolutely not. What I would advise those who are unable to reach their previously set goal is to rewrite the goal as one not achieved through obtaining an end, but through striving on the journey. AKA "You never can fail unless you don't try."
This idea is not a unique one in any form, as it is present in religious strivings as well. In Christianity the belief is that one obtains salvation through their striving for a solid belief, rather than through their accomplishments ("Not of works, lest any man should boast"). In Islam, a believer gains the reward of a Hafiz (someone who has memorized the whole Quran) even when they have not achieved the goal but only put forth genuine effort of learning it ("...And such a person exerts himself to learn the Quran by heart, and recites it with great difficulty, will have a double reward"). I am sure there are many other examples of a similar concept.
Lastly, as you are setting your either spoken or unspoken goals to achieve your personal state of happiness, please remember that if you want for nothing, you will be happy with everything. Do not set your value as an individual based on something tangible that most certainly is fleeting. Your journey would be most rewarding if it is focussed on your satisfaction in the process of striving for improvement, rather than in achieving a final and finite goal.
"Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for." ~Epicurus (Greek Philosopher)
No comments:
Post a Comment